By: Danielle M. Holtz <> From: Danielle M. Holtz [syf1!]
Mon Feb 17 15:33:23 1997
There Are No Flowers Anymore

By Danielle M. Holtz
Location: Bethesda Maryland US

Age:[ 13 ] Gender:[ F ]


	There are no flowers on my mother's grave.
It is against my religion to put them there.
Flowers die and there has already been a death.
So the visitors put stones on the grave.

I am sure that there are a lot of stones on my mother's grave,
But I wouldn't know
Because I don't go there anymore.
Of course, I've been there before --
Once or twice --
Other than the day of her funeral.
That was the time I remember, though.

I was crying and chewing on my stuffed kitty's ear.
That was her name, Kitty.
My mother and father had given her to me for Valentines Day.
Every once in a while I would get up and shovel some dirt on my mother's grave.
The more dirt that was shoveled,
The farther away I was from her physical being.

Goodbye, Mommy.

The other times that I visited,
I looked and wept and left.

I am sure she has a pretty gravestone,
But I wouldn't know, I cannot remember it.
I do knoe that the cemetary is grassy and green.
The trees are  plentyful, and the sky is blue.
But even though the sun always shines,
this place always seems gray and cloudy.

Each time my grandmother comes to visit,
She goes to my mother's grave
As if going there enough will bring my mother back.
My grandmother told me that she tells my mother what is going on lately.
Only, I know that my mother doesn't need to be told
Because she already knows

Every time I miss my mommy, I talk to her.
I look up at my ceiling and speak
And hope that she's listening.

She knows that I miss her, and she knows that I love her.
I know that she misses and loves me, too,
And I know that she is watching over me.

-- Danielle M. Holtz . . . [ ]

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